No Strings Attached

Posted By Kathleen David on January 2, 2022

My mind is wandering today working through problems and issues I must deal with.

I did sort out the kitchen so that’s one off the list.

The final laundry load is in the dryer.

Now I have cat boxes and the weekly sweeping of the floors to do.

Then I move onto the next big cleaning project.

Tomorrow is all about Caroline and getting her home safely with all her stuff including the lovely sword her uncle made for her.

Sean also taught her the basics of welding in his shop. She took to it like a duck to water. She wants to learn more.

The cats have forgiven us for going away. Fig has been attached to Caroline since she got back.

The drive to Atlanta picked up two and a half hours from Baltimore to south of DC. Driving home, our GPS took us a back road that we are going to keep in mind for future trips.

We did have a wonderful visit in Atlanta catching up with most of my side of the family.

I am back into my groove with some extra time due to reduction of hours at work. Which is a good thing and a bad thing at the same time. 

There are several articles I have been reading about people losing it over the smallest thing. A lot of this is being vented on the workers in stores or on an airplane. 

I have noticed this too. I look back to my stage-management days for my explanation of this behavior. I got yelled at by actors, directors, and crew. I learned at Yale that they are not yelling at me but the situation. If they go to tantrum, then it is not me or the situation at all but some outside stressor that they are getting out of their system.

There is a lot we are not in control of and that is very frustrating. This stress going on two years in March has been building. 

We have all this inside us and we need an outlet for it.

Some people don’t have a healthy outlet. We have statistics that speak to those issues showing that people are drinking more. Drug overdoses are up. Gambling is up. I put that down to the number of states were gambling is now legal. Fights are up as is divorce.

All those behaviors add to the stress.

Then there is the COVID fight. Not the virus part but the human part. Masking is mandated inside buildings in New York. That is the whole state. There is a lot of resistance to putting masks back on by both parties. I have watching adults swear out employees because they are vaccinated and don’t see why THEY must mask.

We are all stressed right now. How we deal with the stress is important.

I am grateful for things that relieve stress.

Category: Uncategorized | No Comments »
Tags:

Posted By Kathleen David on January 1, 2022

And now we are here at the beginning of 2020.

Again, no resolutions due to the randomness of the world right now.

However, I do plan to spend some time on me and figuring out how to improve myself and my mental health.

This will allow me to be a better caregiver.

If I have run myself into the ground, I cannot help others.

That is something that has been emphasized to me more than once in the past year.

As we do and don’t return to pre-pandemic conditions or what the new normal will be, I find myself in a crouch waiting for the next shoe to figure out if it is going to be fight or flight.

I need some time to process what is happening to me and around me. I have been just existing moving from one crisis to another and trying to pick up the pieces around me before the next thing hit.

This year I really hope I have more time to pick up and put away.

A lot of this will depend on the year itself and what surprises it throws at me.

Right now, I feel hope for this year and continued improvement.

That is a lot better than I was doing a year ago.

I am grateful for any time I have for me.

Category: Uncategorized | No Comments »
Tags:

Posted By Kathleen David on December 29, 2021

I feel the need to reflect on the year.

Was it better than 2020? Marginally for me.

I was happier once I was vaccinated. I was happier when I could walk around without a mask.

Then came Delta and Omicron and we are back to everyone wearing masks indoors. This still doesn’t. sit well with me. The Selfish are making life hard for the rest of us and killing people in the process. 

There was a NYTimes article that pointed out people with conditions that need hospitalization like sepsis are being denied beds to the point that when they do get a bed, it is too late for something that could have been cured a few days earlier. They should be in the COVID stats as well. They might not have died of COVID, but they died because of COVID.

I told Peter at this point we should have unvaccinated hospitals and vaccinated hospitals. Then there would be beds for those who did man up and take the shot(s). The exception on that would be people who have a REAL medical reason for not getting the shot like severe allergies or a condition that prevents one for getting the vaccine.

Creatively I had my ups and downs including a depressive period when nothing would come together for me. That was very frustrating. Then there was a period when I had no energy which continued the frustration. I came to peace which that when I realized how much I was working in a week at my job.

There were times that my mind was in creative overdrive. I had a gig fixing some puppets for a play in New York. I made a marionette for one of Caroline’s friends based on their drawing for a film project. There were other things I worked on and got to the next point. My list is still as long if not longer at this point and I plan on witling it down next year. 

We lost a number of friends this year including Mira Furlan. Each one hurts.

Most of my year has been working at any of my jobs with Michael’s clocking the most hours. I still love my job. I became permanent part time before my seasonal contract was up. That job keeps my mind nimble, and I rarely look at what the time is. I set up alarms to remember when my breaks are and when I am supposed to leave. It is a good group that I work with. We are diverse and have many accomplishments among us.

I attended my arts brunch this year after more than a year off. We did Zoom meetings, but it is not the same. I look forward to more in person meetings in the near future.

I did a lot in this year, but I never think it is enough.

I have a couple of ideas on how to combat idleness that I am going to put in place next year.

I also need to set a gym schedule. I have been going but it has been rather random and not consistent enough for me.

I am grateful for things that made me happy this past year.

Category: Uncategorized | No Comments »
Tags:

Posted By Kathleen David on December 25, 2021

Between the last Christmas that we were down in Atlanta (2019) and this Christmas, a lot has changed.

For one thing, my parents sold their house and bought a condo which is much smaller than the two story four bedroom three and a half bathrooms they had in 2019.

For another, Caroline is now considered an adult.

But traditions remain intact.

We had our traditional Christmas Eve dinner followed by the first cookies of the season for us then to the midnight mass at ten pm.

Today is Eggs Benedict and presents under the tree. Then we plan on seeing Kingsman at a local theater.

The Christmas dinner will be a rare roast beast, bake potato and more cookies with a lovely red wine.

Tomorrow I plan my yearly pilgrimage to the Center of Puppetry Arts to see what has changed in a year.

Traditions makes holidays like this feel….well normal or as normal as we are going to get these days.

It is amazing to see my parents and siblings again. 

It is amazing to be able to celebrate this holiday in person with my family.

I never took it for granted but now I appreciate it even more.

What has happened since March 2019 has given me a lot of time to think about what I value. Possessions are nice but not the end all be all. 

The time I have with my family and friends has become what I value the most now. I know I cannot take any of my time for granted for I don’t know what is coming around the corner.

Today I am enjoying the time with people I love and appreciating every minute.

I am so very grateful I am at my parents for Christmas.

Category: Uncategorized | No Comments »
Tags:

Posted By Kathleen David on December 10, 2021

I have done a couple of entries but nothing like I did during the lockdown from the pandemic.

And that is okay.

I have been doing several things outside of cyber world including working a lot at my job at Michael’s since we are in the middle of the Holiday rush. People have been very understanding when we don’t have things we normally have. That is very nice. I am starting to learn framing so I can work in the Frame shop as well as the other departments I have already learned. After that I will have done everything except shipping and managing.

I have built a couple of puppets and got paid on a repair gig. Tuesday I will talk about Patches the Bunny.

I found out that my friend and one of Peter’s best friends George Perez, who is an amazing artist that has done several projects with Peter, had stage four pancreatic cancer and made the decision to forgo Chemo for quality of life rather than quantity.  My sympathies to him, his lovely wife and his family and friends. This sucks beyond the telling.

I lost another friend to COVID. I am not liking that the number of friends I have lost to COVID now surpasses the number that died of complications from AIDS and it is not stopping.

Mental health of our youth has become a topic of conversation that should have been so many years ago. The last two year has been hard on them for so many reasons. We will have a generation that have been traumatized by this stupid pandemic. And we do not know the effect on our very young, babies to toddlers, and their socialization skills and mental health. It will be interesting to see the fall out and scary at the same time.

My biggest worry where all the children who fell through the cracks during the shutdown. There are people who learn better from in person instruction rather than remote. I was very lucky that Caroline is such a self-starter and was able to keep up with her classes both online and in person. I do know that she is much happier with in person learning.

Blown Away, the glass blowing competition, has a short but lovely holiday show on Netflix. I really enjoy watching the artists take sand and create beautiful objects. 

I also like Making It, one of the few shows I think I would have a shot at winning. I still watch Project Runway and am enjoying this new season. I have enjoyed all the seasons of the Great Pottery Throwdown but do not know if I am going to get the 5^th season due to contract reasons. Full Bloom is lovely, and I have learned a lot about arranging flowers.

I miss Faceoff. I wish we could have a decent cosplay competition tv show. The couple we have were not that great. If they had taken Faceoff as the templet to build off from, I think they would have been better.

I wish I had more time to do more things. I do get angry at myself when I waste my time frivolously on things that do not further my creative abilities. I guess I do have the time but am not using it wisely.

Today is my day off for about a week, which is fine. I have things to around the house and some grocery shopping to do. I am hoping to have the time and the energy to get some creative on.

But first cat boxes because I want to be able to breath and as soon as they go south, I can smell ‘em.

I am grateful for all I do get done today.

Category: Uncategorized | No Comments »
Tags: