No Strings Attached

Posted By Kathleen David on October 28, 2018

Sticks and Stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me-playground chant

Who will rid me of this meddlesome priest?-Henry II

I am angry about the events of this week. I mourn for the lives lost. I am furious that those whose words set these events into motion are pretending that they hold no responsibility for the actions of those who would harm and kill others in their name. Maybe not as directly as Henry’s overheard words did but still they said things in public that made it OK for others to carry out what they said.

My rule for words I use when it comes to anything I say on the Internet are few but set in stone.

I attach my name to it in that I don’t use cute handles to say things. I do say things as Puppetmaker40 on various social media platforms but it can be easily traced back to me and I have been using the handle for 15 years now. Google Puppetmaker40 and you get me except the flickr account, which I have no idea who has that one.

I say on the Internet what I would say to a person’s face or on a panel at a convention or in public.

If I find myself not in a good place, I wait before I comment or post on the Internet.

As Craig Ferguson put it,

3 questions to ask yourself before you speak…
1. Does this need to be said.
2. Does this need to be said by me.
3. Does this need to be said by me NOW!”

And just for the record after saying something the phrase “Oh I didn’t mean it” or “I didn’t mean it like that” is not a get out of the situation free card. Nor is “you need a sense of humor” although there are occasions that phrase is acceptable so that’s not an absolute.

It seems impossible to having meaningful dialogue these days. The art of the debate is dead. It seems to come down to who can shout the loudest and longest ‘wins’. Then there is the whole morass of false equivalencies and other tools used to silence voices.

I never though it possible to gaslight a nation but here we are with guns and bombs being used to ‘make a point’ based on the words of people who are very loud.

For those of you who haven’t heard the term ‘gaslight’

Gaslight- (verb) manipulate (someone) by psychological means into questioning their own sanity.

And there has been a lot of that going on these days.

I am saddened by all this.

I have gotten to the point that I cannot even watch the political commentary shows because it just makes me too angry.

Reading the paper makes me cry from frustration that a loud few are drowning out anything the rest of us say.

I weep for my country and the political and social climate I find myself in.

There are times that I can’t find the right words to express myself. There are times that I don’t express myself because I feel like what I have to say has been said elsewhere much more eloquently that I can ever say.

I am tired of the people who have decided that their life’s work is tearing people down and making them feel bad aka trolls and trolling.

I am tired of people saying that others are just too sensitive but when called on their behavior they turn into the biggest ‘snowflakes’ that one has ever seen.

I am tired of people being dismissed with cute acronyms.

I am just so tired of words not having any meaning.

No, I take that back.

I am tired of being dismissed because I have no meaning or can be put side with a few choice acronyms as not important to the discussion.

I am tired of people not taking responsibly for what they say.

I am tired of the hiding behind fake names.

I am tired of people saying things on the Internet they would never say in the public square or to someone’s face.

Words have meaning. They have always and will always have meaning.

I will continue to put my name to my words and take responsibility for what I say.
I just wish others would do the same.

I am grateful for those who stand behind what they say and do not hide.

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Posted By Kathleen David on October 27, 2018

Went to bed and the world was quiet.

Got up in the morning to find the wind whipping around with the pouring rain to boot.

Looked outside to find most of our Halloween graveyard pretty much torn up with the gravestones torn from the stakes I use to affix them in the ground.

It is an inside day for sure.

Now figuring out what to do with the day.

Caroline and I have a list of things we want to tackle together.

I am taking a break from the news right now. I am not avoiding nor am I actively seeking it. I know what is going on but I need a break.

I am thinking of stepping away from Social Media for a bit too.

This web log might be my only communication with the world for a bit.

I have things to do and I am finding myself very distracted by what is going on in both the world and my country to the point that I feel very helpless about everything.

I have two things I need to get done writing wise and a couple of projects that I would like to work on. I just need to start somewhere.

Cats have picked all their favorite spaces with the baseboard heater warming their bellies. Mewlan is watching the starlings flittering about in the wind and the rain.

I am thinking chili for dinner. The weather calls for it.

At some point it will stop raining and I will go out and survey the damage to our Halloween display.

We are doing a Back to the Future Marathon today for reasons very fannish.

Caroline is working on her mountain of homework trying to get it down to a mole hill.

I am grateful for weather that makes me think.

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Posted By Kathleen David on October 23, 2018

Imposter Syndrome is defined as “the idea that you’ve only succeeded due to luck, and not because of your talent or qualifications”.

Psychologists Pauline Rose Clance and Suzanne Imes first identified imposter Syndrome in 1978. It was originally considered to mainly as a problem for women especially within the work force in jobs that were predominantly male dominated.

Since then the definition has expanded to add men to the list of people who deal with it.

Or as I call it “that little voice in my head that tells me that I am not worthy of the acclaim I am receiving and someday they will figure out you are a fraud.”

I have to say I have heard that voice less and less as I have gotten older.

I didn’t consider myself an artist until an artist that I respected informed me that the puppets I build are each a work of art even if it is a recreation because I am transforming it into puppet form. My dolls are works of art not just me being crafty.

Another artist got me to see that I will always see the flaws in what I make where others see the project as a whole and don’t know what the flaws are. I know I could do better each time I finish a puppet up but there comes a point that I have to step back and let the puppet stand on its own.

I am much more comfortable to put my puppets out there for others to see than I was 30 years ago.

I have also gotten better over the years. The more I do, the better my craft becomes.

I have been told that I need to believe in myself, which is not easy to do at times. But slowly I realize that I do believe in what I can do. I take on projects that I would have balked at even 10 years ago.

I learned not to compare my work to others work. There are always going to be people who are just going to be better than me and I feel proud that I taught a couple of them how to build puppets. I love teaching people how I do what I do because then there are more people experimenting with puppetry that keeps the art form alive.

I now feel comfortable calling myself an artist but it took some doing to get my brain there.

Do not belittle what you can do.

You have skills that you use to create each and every day.

And when that voice whispers in your ear, tell it to shut up because you do know what you are doing.

I believe in you.

I am grateful for opportunities to teach puppetry.

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Posted By Kathleen David on October 22, 2018

There is a new feature on the iDevices that was added with the last update. Now your iPad and iPhone can tell you how long you were on them and what you were doing. It breaks it down into nice sized scary chunks. I was amazed at how much time I spent online on one or another of my electronic devices.

It was a wake-up call. I had told myself maybe I should be doing something else but now I KNOW I should be doing something more productive. Yes, I do use the games to clear my head but my brain isn’t that foggy.

I am not going to try to limit myself yet. I am going to try to be more mindful of the amount of time I am spending on the Internet and apps and see if I can get it down to something reasonable.

I am thinking about also installing something on my computer that tracks how much I do what.

I had been complaining about not having enough time but I think I just found out where my time went and it is rather embarrassing. I mean those birds can get rid of those pigs on their own, right?

So today I have a number of errands I need to run for the household then I plan to sit down and continue to write a short story I owe an editor. My goal is to get it to him before Thanksgiving. I have another shorter story I want to get in within the next two days to that editor.

I want to get the Halloween lights up along with the graveyard within the next two days. I need to get my Halloween exchange cards finished and sent out in the next three days. One is kind of dependent on the other.

By Anime NY I want to have a Captain Harlock puppet done along with maybe a Gigantor to go old school anime.

I have projects that I want to do but I need to be proactive and make the time to do them. And that is not by exploding colorful blocks with farm animals.

I think I will keep up the blogging. Writing like this shakes my brain lose and I can do more creatively after I get this done.

But as to Facebook and Instagram and the like, that’s going to be cut down a lot.

Willpower I have it and I am going to use it.

I am grateful for delayed gratification.

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Posted By Kathleen David on October 20, 2018

Today my parents are celebrating their 56th wedding anniversary. As I said to my mother this morning, “Isn’t it interesting that there are a number of days on the calendar that you can remember exactly where you were X number of years ago?” This is one of those days for my parents. They got married in her hometown at the church she had been going to since she was a little girl. There was a reception afterwards and then they went back to college to work on their degrees.

In the intervening 56 years they have raised four children and greeted three grandchildren into the world. They have gone on to both receiving their doctorates and tenure at their respective universities. They have resorted and augmented the gardens in their backyard and received accolades for doing so. They have their hobbies they still enjoy. Both retired, they now travel and see the world or just putter around the house as they want to.

I have always held my parents as my example of how to parent. They taught me that each child is different and what might work for one will not work for the others. I also knew my limits and what was allowed and not allowed. I didn’t have anything sprung on me out of the blue.

I have also turned to their example of how a marriage works well. They would present a united front on a decision. I knew I couldn’t go to Dad if Mom said No and vice versa. There was give and take between the two of them. They are affectionate to each other. Not saying that they didn’t have their disputes but they never had them in front of us which is apparently unusual. Peter and I operate the same way. I never felt my entire life that my parents might get a divorce and there is a security in that which may children don’t have.

I love my parents dearly and am happy that I am their child.

Happy Anniversary Mom and Dad. Hope you have fun this evening.

I am grateful for my parents and their example of how a marriage can work.

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